“Blooming heck Paul I miss the big day, I wish I could rewind to when you arrived, I just didn’t take it in”

I don’t know, this kind of hit me a little bit

I was talking to a bride who’s wedding I’d shot not too long ago, talking about plans for a feature of her day that was about to appear on a wedding blog and she’d said this to me, I have to admit it’s something that’s played on my mind.

One of the things about being a wedding photographer is that you kind of have to be pretty observant right, I mean that goes without saying. You’re there in the middle of a wedding and you are witness to it all. And that’s great, I love that. I get invited in to people’s lives, people who would otherwise be complete strangers, and I get to capture the story of this whirlwind of a day.

But that’s the thing, is it all just a bit too much of a whirlwind?

18 months of planning, all your friends, all your family, a 100+ people, the band, wedding planners, me, it’s just all pretty big isn’t it.

You feel like you need to speak to everyone, you feel like you need to thank them all for coming, for their gifts. You feel like you need to pose for selfies and pictures with everyone and before you know it you’ve not actually spoken to your new husband or wife for an hour.

I see this more and more and I’m just not sure that’s what people are hoping for from their wedding day.

I think one of the biggest struggles we all face in this world is actually being present, being truly present in the moment.

Our lives seem to fly by at a 1000 miles per hour, I swear it was Christmas like 6 weeks ago! I’m sure my 7 year old son was a little baby keeping us awake all night just a couple of years ago. I’m sure of it. It just doesn’t seem real. And that’s the thing, you have to take it in, you have to be present.

I know I’m part of this machine, I understand that, but it doesn’t matter. I’ve been part of over a hundred weddings and I think this needs to be said. You are at the point where you are putting this day together, more than anything I want it to live up to your hopes.

Let the plan for the day be what it is, maybe the day doesn’t need to quite so huge, maybe it could just be the two of you and your closest people. I don’t know, but what I do know is that yeah it’s a big deal, and yeah the plan is important and the party is important, but before anything it has to be about two people being together, that has to come first.

Bride and Groom holding hands